


The Misadventures of the Cheshire Cat

by ABugFromAMusicalClime



Category: Alice In Wonderland - Lewis Carroll, Cheshire Cat - Fandom, Oz - L. Frank Baum
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-12-18
Updated: 2017-12-18
Packaged: 2019-02-16 13:06:47
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,981
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13054611
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ABugFromAMusicalClime/pseuds/ABugFromAMusicalClime
Summary: The adventures of the Cheshire Cat as inter-dimensional traveling being. Sometimes the cat will help others, sometimes she will hinder. Whatever entertains her.





	The Misadventures of the Cheshire Cat

 

WANTED: FEROCIOUS CAT TERRORIZING THE LOCAL MICE POPULATION

REWARD: 1,00O GOLD PIECES TO WHOEVER CAN CATCH THIS WICKED CAT AND BRING IT TO THE EMERALD CITY FOR TRIAL

BY ORDER OF HER ROYAL MAJESTY OZMA

This sounded good. The traveler had no idea how he got here. Well, there was that tornado, but he had never seen a country like this. Talking animals, animate objects, professors who were bugs and a tale about a young girl who with a lion, a scarecrow and a man made out of tin who destroyed a magic being. He didn't like this. Perhaps, however, this ruler would look favorably upon him and help him get back home if he could take care of this cat. Really? How hard could it be to take of a cat? Behind him was a sign saying Mice Village. He grabbed the poster and left.

After an hour he walked into what appeared to be a miniaturized village. Mice in habits were walking in and out of the buildings. The center of this village appeared to be a monastery.

“Greetings, traveler. I see you are not from this country. May I inquire where you are from?” Startled the traveler looked down at his feet where the sound was coming from. There was an old mouse who was leaning on a cane.

“Kentucky, sir.”

“Similar to that place Dorothy came from, Kansas.”

“Yes, they are in the same country.”

“Oh, I see much like the four territories of Oz.”

“What takes you to our humble village?”

“I was brought here by a tornado. I having been looking for a way home. I thought your ruler might help me and..” He blushed. He couldn't admit the only reason he considered helping them was because he wanted to get home. The old mouse chuckled.

“You saw the poster and thought you could curry favor.” The traveler went an even deeper shade of red.

“It okay youngster. I can guess at how desperate you could be trying to get home. Follow me. We have a place for **bigger** guests.”

He led him to a building he hadn't seen in the distance. It looked like it was made for regular people. The traveler relaxed, feeling a little bit sheepish. The mouse entered a moving elevator which allowed him to lead the traveler quickly through the building. The mouse's expert maneuvering of the machine amazed the traveler. They quickly came to a small but well-kept room.

“Sleep here for the night. Jojo, our monkey steward will be available if you need anything and will call you when dinner is ready. I can get in touch with Ozma in the meanwhile. The girlish ruler would be pleased to help someone from Princess Dorothy's country.” The traveler felt even more sheepish and decided that he would definitely catch that awful cat. He couldn't even imagine what creature would mess with these kind mice. It was the least he could do to repay the old mice's kindness.

The dinner that evening was wonderful and he slept wonderfully, much better than he had in days. The old mouse had come back in the morning saying that it would take a few days to talk to Ozma to as she was handling urgent matters. He said he was welcome to stay for as long as it took to contact Ozma. The traveler quickly inquired about the cat as soon as the old mouse left. Apparently, this cat lived in the caves not far from there. He went out created a noose from branches and some string he had in a pack and went into the caves. I took a while but he eventually found a cave that was marked with scratches and whose front was littered with mouse bones.

“Stop there.” The traveler looked around and saw a striped cat perched on a ledge of the cave. He ran toward the cat.

“Stop there I said.” The cat appeared on another ledge in the cave.

“What?”

“My dear, you are in a fairyland. What were you expecting?”

The traveler stammered then said, “Wait, I've read about you. You're the Cheshire Cat! But how could that be? That's a story! You misdirected Alice and disappeared on her.”

“Alice? What Alice? ”

“You know the little girl who followed the rabbit down the hole?”

The cat retorted playfully, “Oh, that Alice! I would be careful if I were you. She has quite the imagination! Not that I don't _love_ a good imagination, but I'm a _CAT_ and whoever heard of a cat disappearing into thin air?” His tail started to disappear one dark band at a time as he said this and the traveler gasped in shock.

“Well..." She paused.

“I _do_ , _do_ a disappearing act once in a while, but nothing like that. This is a mere _trick_ for amusement.” Her tail reappeared as she said this.

“Didn't you like it?” The traveler stood dumbfounded.

“If you're going to speak. _SPEAK!_ ” The traveler snapped out of his dumbfoundment.

“I heard you've been attacking the local mice population. I'm here to stop you.”

“Look here mister....or is it _ma'm?_ I can never get the two straight. You have no chance in stopping _ME_. Besides, I'm just having fun with them. It's so fun to see them _squiiiirm!_ ”

“Chesire, this can't go on. Sentient mice have died.”

“ _I  A M  J U S T  H A V I N G  F U N..._ Or didn't you hear me? If I really wanted to kill the little nuggets, they would already be _DEAD!_ ” The cat paused and cleared her throat.

“I just toy with them, leave the body of a non-sentient mouse I ate the day before, chase them, that sort of thing. By the way, if you could not tell them, I would appreciate it. It's more to fun to chase terrorized mice. One must have something to do in their old age.” The cat paused and waives to the readers.

“You can't believe everything Old Carroll wrote. He embellished many things over what even Alice imagined. I hope to have fun with you. Don't worry. I can't come out of the page, though I wish I could.”

The traveler was even more convinced that this Cat was a loony, but then again this was _The Cheshire Cat_.

“Look, sentient mice are no fun to eat. They taste bad, and they don't go down well. Now, shoo! Before I change my mind and decide to rip you to shreds!” The Cat flexed her claws. One must show authority as a Cat after all. Sorry readers, the Chesire cat took over narration for a bit.

The cat grew to an enormous size that filled the cave and gave what sounded between a roar and bark. The traveler frightened ran out of the cave. The cat soon returned to her normal size.

“Hmm,” said the cat interested.

“I wonder why that spineless traveler came instead of the Royal Army of Oz? Maybe, I should find out.” The Emerald City was not far from the Mouse Village. Just a few jumps along the yellow brick road would do it. The cat picked up her few possessions and vanished from the cave.

* * *

 

The cat appeared before the Great Gates of the Emerald City. She walked up alongside a couple coming up to the door. The couple pressed a button and the sound of a tinkling bell followed. The gates opened to a room with high arches apparently intended to act as a waiting room. A small man, the guard started to walk up and the cat quietly appeared behind the man.

“Was there a cat with you?” asked the confused guard.

“No. She would never allow a cat in our house,” answered husband.

“I thought I saw a cat come up with you and as you know all visitors must report to me before entering.” The guard turned and looked around several times but the cat appeared in a different spot every time he thought he saw something.

“I think I need to see a doctor. Let's get this over quickly.” The cat gently pushed the door behind the guard open as he continued to interview the couple. She moved quickly through the door and it slammed shut. She could hear the startled guard jump.

“I thought I had that door closed.” The cat grinned a smile expanded from one side of her face to the other. This was already very entertaining. Much like the incident with the Queen of Hearts. The cat turned around and saw a huge crowd running here and there.

The cat appeared on top of a booth and leaned over to ask the owner a question, “What direction is it to the palace?” The owner jumped.

“Mr. cat would you not sneak up on me like that? It's in that direction but don't expect to get in. All audiences with Queen Ozma have been suspended recently. Only officials like the Tin Emperor can get in. Now, please get off my booth,” he shakily responded.

“Why, yes.” The cat dissappeared all except her head. The owner backed up.

“By the way, I love the way you people decorate. I've never seen so much _GREEN!_ ” The cat's head then disappeared.

“I hope I never see that cat again,” the owner whispered.

The cat appeared some distance in the direction the owner had pointed behind a group of people every dozen feet or so. Eventually, he saw a grand staircase that led to what looked to be the palace. He appeared on top of a guard in front of the palace.

"Okay, mister. How did you get there?" The cat meowed.

"I'm not falling for that."

"But maybe you'll fall for this." The cat immediately grew to the size of a tiger and caused the guard to fall down under her weight.

"I'll take that." The cat grabbed the keys off the guard while holding him down. She then disappeared. The guard gently pulled himself up and began to search for the cat.

"Come here mister or I will call the Royal Army to come and get you."

"Please go ahead and do that. I have been SO looking forward to meeting him," answered a disembodied voice. The guard looked in the direction of the voice but could see nothing. He walked to where he figured the voice should be coming from felt around the area with his foot. Nothing. He turned around and went back to check his post. His keys were on the desk next to the doors. He checked the doors and they were locked. Confused, the guard shook his head. How was this possible? Maybe he needed to see a doctor. The cat chuckled inside the doors.

"What a naughty cat you are." Shocked the cat turned around to see a chicken with a necklace around its neck.

"I suppose you are the cat that's been terrorizing the mice village."

"Those reports have been greatly exaggerated." The cat stood up on its back legs and placed front right paw on her heart.

"I never would hurt  _poor, innocent_ mice. I just tried to engage them a friendly game of tag. They mistook my intent and branded me a  _TERRORIST!_ " The cat added a gasp for dramatic effect. The chicken shook her head.

"I have never seen a cat act like you do but what do I expect. You're a CAT!" The chicken started to squawk. The cat pounced on the chicken and silenced her.

"Billina, my dear Billina. There is no need for that." The cat quickly looked around. A grate leading to a deep vent was nearby. She appeared, Billina still under her at the bottom of the vent.

"Stay here." The cat appeared outside the vent where she could barely hear Billina's squawks. Now to find the throne room.

 


End file.
